Troubled Waters

I am continuing my journey in FAITH ALONE a daily devotional based on the writings of Martin Luther. Walking in faith is not easy and it tests your endurance when things do not go according to the way you envisaged. Earlier this month I celebrated my engagement to Chris. His parents even placed an announcement in the local paper, so we got our 5 seconds of fame! We’ve been juggling wedding plans, with Chris looking for jobs and our regular commitments to our church. Chris had two interviews, one before we got engaged and one after. We were so certain that he would have gotten the job for the second interview. We saw how convenient it would be (he wouldn’t have to commute), the pay was reasonable for an entry level position and it would be great timing, as that would be one more thing to cross of the list of things to do. He didn’t get the job and it was such a crushing blow to all of us, Chris, me and his parents. You could almost see the rain cloud hovering over us for the rest of the day. When I spoke to Chris, I just broke down and cried. I tried to comfort myself with words such as ‘if it was God’s will he would have gotten it’; ‘God will supply all our need according to His riches in glory’; ‘I have a plan for you, says the Lord…to give you a hope and a future’. But emotionally I was broken. I screamed out to God ‘What is the plan?!’ ‘What are we supposed to do?!’

Then in my daily devotional a couple days after this happened, this was the title of it ‘WHEN WE FEEL FORGOTTEN’. Yep! That was exactly how I was feeling. Almost that God had forgotten that we’re getting married next year and we really need this job situation sorted out. The commentary was based on the passage when Joseph felt he was forgotten by the cupbearer and he struggled with the temptation of becoming impatient and complaining. Martin Luther says that the times when we feel like this, are the times when we should let the praise of God be on our lips “I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips” (Psalm 34:1). By doing this ‘temptation, sadness and unbelief disappear’. It also at these times when there are troubled waters that Satan loves to go fishing and bring up all those feelings of uncertainty about your faith. Did God really say that He will do this for you? Should really be getting married this soon? Maybe you should postpone the wedding to give Chris some more time to find a job? And you begin to doubt the instructions that God gave you, which is to be persevere in faith and believe in His Word. We know that God gave us April 6 2008 as our wedding date – it’s a date of faith. If we back out of it now, what does that say about our faith? When I was really low, I heard God say to me ‘How much do you trust me? I gave you more than you imagined towards this wedding, will you trust me all the way through?’ And the answer is yes! You never know where you’re going to go when you decide to walk in faith, but you can trust the guide, He’s seen eternity.

I still pray for God to open doors for Chris and help him to find favour when he goes for interviews. He has interview on Oct 1, we’ll see if this is the job God wants for him….